Mixed Bag

So Siddhant is into his third day on earth and his parents are, I suppose, slowly comprehending the extent and gravity of their responsibility now. Debarati and I are seriously coming around to the idea of becoming mothers sooner or later some day. We are more concerned about whether our respective husbands are ready to shoulder such responsibility, burdened as they are with work and sleepless nights and liable to turn irritable at the slightest domestic provocation. Not that we're complaining. If we don't understand them, who will ? But what troubles us more about them is whether they are in any position to be shouldering any more worries, baby related and all. K openly admits that anything pregnancy-related makes him feel queasy and although I initially found that material for considerable hilarity, the fact that he may seriously feel that way doesn't exactly bode confidence for the future. I only hope seeing the way Sushmit-Namita are handling their parenthood inspires more respect in him for the role that parents fulfil and reduces his trepidation at assuming a similar status in the not-so-distant-future.

Meanwhile, we have received the second batch of photos from the 'thrilled and proud parents' (to quote them verbatim) and the accompanying updates too over the phone. Baby Sid is not very pleased, it seems, at the excretory operations that the body must regularly perform and announces the fact quite vociferously each time he has to participate in the painful process. Ah, if only he knew that this is nothing compared to what greater obstacles life holds in store for us humans, he would be a happier man. But I certainly (and to my intense perplexity !)prevaricate. Let him become a child first, then ...er well, ok, much later perhaps...we may broach the topic of maturing into manhood etc.

Tanima and I have been discussing the Baby in Our Lives and have arrived at the consensus that He is likely to do us all proud, what with sporting so much hair at birth (apparently the proud parents did not have much of the same at their respective births and hence, feel justifiably relieved at their offspring's accomplishment) and displaying such a prominently aquiline nose (remarkable indeed for a newborn baby) so early in life. I personally think that there isn't much he could do to not blossom into a good-looking chap, with such a handsome father and a petite and pretty mother handing down some real genetic goodies. My only hope is that he turns out to be a lean-and-not-so-mean hunk with a heart as golden as that of his family and on a slightly divergent note, doesn't have our tendency to gain weight at the slightest and sweetest provocation.

Halloween was a big flopshow yesterday. K was in a flurry to purchase some candy yesterday evening at RiteAid nearby to satisfy the trick-or-treat demands of the children in our complex but none turned up. Probably because they supposed we wouldn't understand the significance of their festival. We spotted quite a few of them across the road from Rite Aid, dressed in some grotesque costumes (sorry, I for one can't conjure up any more apt epithet for the same) like that of a bumble-bee and a butterfly and more appropriately (I hope that's the right word in this context), masks of devils and ghouls and nasty other synonyms that escape my memory (thank goodness) at present. We bought a cask of orange-pineapple flavoured coolers and a bottle of mojito at a discount store nearby to cheer us up on such a cold Friday night and to console us on the inability to celebrate Diwali this year, owing to particularly inclement weather. A father appeared while we were there with two tiny children, attired in disproportionately huge wigs in bizarre shades of orange and soot black. I was considerably entertained at the sight of such small children at a liquor store, but thankfully, it seems, they were out on their regulation halloween outing and promptly demanded 'lowwippops' of the Indian lady manning (?!) the counter. They were rewarded with chocolates. Their father had to assure them that they had got a better deal than they had expected, not that the children themselves seemed very convinced of that at the end. By the way, I must confess extreme annoyance at the way a couple of young Indian men ogled at me while I stood by the counter and K had gone to get the mojito. I know it might not be very natural in our country to see women in a liquor store and their behaviour could and perhaps should be excused on that account itself. All the same, it is rather an affront to notice men staring open-mouthed (literally), when they can quite make out that you are not happy at their attitude and would rather be overlooked. I have never learned till date to take any form of gazing at me as a compliment in any way. I'm sure many other women also feel the same way.

This afternoon, we undertook a trip to the Manville Walmart in our new car. K did me proud by driving quite competently despite the entirely different system of driving we have had to get used to here. We had to get some gas near East Main Street and were disgusted to discover the amount we had lavished on cab fares ever since our arrival here, especially after we had calculated the gallons of gas we could have bought at that amount. Well, better late than never. Walmart was crowded as usual on a weekend day, particularly as the weather was quite clear and pleasant. Besides the usual necessities like bread and milk, we shopped for car accessories this time, which was definitely a novelty for me. Car deo, car sponge, ice scraper, wet wipes...wow, we do love our car ! Also discovered potpourri in some interesting fragrances like mulberry, hazelnut cream and apple-cinnamon. The latter was a bit overwhelming and the hazelnut one was rejected on grounds of our common failure to appreciate the thought of our bathroom smelling like a Dunkin-Donuts outlet. The usual and expected confusion took place at the cosmetics section where purchasing a cold cream turned out to be a major headache for formerly mentioned reasons (the monstrous variety, for those who suffer from amnesia like me) and locating a simple pair of socks engendered considerable mirth (since I eventually purchase two pairs in light and deep blue and in material that resembled the feel of a soft toy more than it did any form of cotton or wool). A navy blue tweed skirt on sale was the unexpected additional purchase, more so for the simple reason that it actually did fit my paunch and looked good too (the two rarely go hand-in-hand, in my case).

We had a wonderful but rather belated lunch of ghee-bhaat with daal, alusheddho and deembhaaja at 4 pm. Well, in retrospect, it might not have been that late, considering that we had had breakfast at 10.30 am...

Social Sunday...

Hi, everyone. Yesterday, Sunday 7th July, was a day of socializing. Just before lunch yesterday,one of K’s colleagues (in the same account, but not part of the same project), Sabyasachi, came over. He is the same person who booked us into this hotel and also arranged for the cab that brought us here from the airport. As I said, we were not being able to do anything here until we had a car, since everything is so scattered around the place. Sabya took us in his car to a shopping mall called Bridgewater Commons, about 7 mins by car from our hotel.Okhane we found a small open-air booth of T-mobile and got ourselves a cell connection.

[Ekhane the strange thing is that you have only CDMA connections, which means that you cannot choose to buy your cellphn model and take a network separately.Phones are available only when you take a connection, but you can opt for a free phn (which means a very simple and basic model) or pay extra for a good phn (although the good phns all seem quite expensive, i.e. greater than 160 dollars). K had very good Nokia cell phn ,which he had bought in USA when he was here previously,but he has misplaced the charger, so we cannot use it. The charger of my Indian cell does fit well into it, but that doesn’t help in USA, as the plug sockets there need very fine-pointed pins, which my charger doesn’t have. So, we get two free phns with our T-mobile connection, of which we already received one yesterday,and shall get the other on the 18th. There was a choice between a Samsung and a Nokia phn, I opted for the Nokia since we’ve got used to handling Nokia sets and their batteries are also reputed to be better.]

Back to non-technical stuff. I really liked the layout of the mall, where there were both big and branded shops as well as open-air hawkers and open-air eateries.People here all seem very casually dressed most of the time and no one really cares whether you are wearing too many or too little clothes, except of course, if you are exceptionally shabby or gaudy.By the way, most of the brands are all available in India, and here too, Sabya Da says, their sales aren’t really sales most of the time, mane they offer you discounts on increased prices. Human nature remains the same everywhere, I suppose !!!

After this, Sabya took us to Desi Bazaar, a shop on N Gaston Avenue, Somerville. It is run by a Gujarati lady and seems to contain almost everything we Indians might need, under one roof – be it breads and cereals, ready to eat foods, biscuits, juices, soups, fruits and vegetables, packed laddoos/mithais, ready to eat rotis/naans/kulchas, non-veg preparations like tea, spices, picles, dettol, cosmetics, bread etc.We bought toasted biscuits (of Britannia), bread (26 slices in a packet), mixed bhel (muri mixed with other condiments),r eady-to-eat rajma-chawal,mutter paneer, pindi chana, dal makhani, palak paneer, sarson ka saag, jeera rice, ready-to-eat chicken tandoori in spinach sauce and kebab rolls, etc. All this was for or next week’s dinner and my lunch also, since K is to lunch in his office canteen. Nowadays our policy is usually to partake of a heavy breakfast (complimentary from the hotel) and a light lunch. Today, for example, I lunched on Maggi soup and bread followed by yogurt (2 packs of which we carry to our rooms after breakfast, as our breakfast is heavy enough without them! ). K had a fish sandwich and an apple juice for lunch at the canteen today, he says.

Anyway, we had a very late lunch at the hotel after Sabya Da dropped us. We were just preparing for a nap when my school friend Sharmistha and her husband, Sourav, dropped in. They live in Flanders, abt 40 miles away from Raritan ( and a 40 mins’ drive). Sharmistha has gained quite a lot of weight, considering she was always reed-thin. She was extremely perplexed as to why it had suddenly occurred to Shobhana to send her a gift via me, that too without any specific occasion in mind. They stayed here for quite a while, we had a great time. Her hubby is a very quiet, solemn and intelligent looking chap. Needless to say, Sharmistha does enough talking on behalf of both of them!!! She is a darling. She is absolutely ecstatic to see me at last and gave us a lot of valuable advice on various aspects of life and living in USA. Honestly, everyone is helping us so much, I don’t know how we would ever manage without them.
Biyer por theke USA eshe neejer guchher sari phele rekhechhe, aktao occasion paini kothao porar but amar saris dekhe akhono extremely thrilled aar bokaboki korlo registry marriage er deen akta simple sari porechhilam. Aar kobe je amai oi uncultured lokjon er moto silk er sari r shathe rubiar blouse pora bondho hobe, shei niye prochur jhad dilo.They departed after coffee/tea etc (provided 24 hrs, free, by our hotel).

By that time, it was already 7.30 pm. We changed hurriedly, since Sabya was supposed to pick us up for dinner at their place around 8pm.I wore the new salwar suit that Mamoni-Bapi had gifted me on the occasion of Poila Boishakh, realising that this was one of the few rare instances when I would have an opportunity to wear ethnic attire at all. ( K says I look like a lady, but I personally think that was because he had got tired of seeing me in jeans for the past one week or so !). Sabya was punctual enough.It was hardly a 10 mins’ drive to their place.His wife Moumita was elated to see us.She is very slim, slightly dark-complexioned,very eloquent, very pretty.Prothome she served us cold drinks and chips.I had pineapple juice, since I’m on a weight loss mission.Prochur adda holo.Sabyasachi ke prothome khub chupchaap aar serious mone hoechhilo, but badite he really opened up and oder byaranor mojaar shob goppo bollo.He lives in BJ block in Salt Lake while Moumita r baaper badi is in Kasba Bakultala.Ora Independence day weekend e Niagara byadate gechhilo by bus and since K had been there before, they had a great time comparing their respective experiences.Ektu pore Ratul bole oder office er akata chhokra dropped in ( he had also been invited), K ero chena.Ratul told us of his harrowing experiences with dentists’ bills in the US. Moumita bollo or ak relative ache in the USA, she naaki bolechhe taar dui chhelemeye ke plumber aar dentist banaabe (considering they earn much more than our husbans are or will ever earn!!!) We had bhaat, motorshnuti diye moog er daal, chicken curry,bnadhakopir torkaari,bagda chingrir jhol and aam er chutney for dinner. Sabyasachir paala chhilo oi din rate thaala dhowar, jodio amra shobai volunteer korlam to help out. Their home is very plainly but prettily furnished aar bheeshon comfortable.One –bedroom apartment, but living space ta besh bodo. Bishal black rexine sofas, akta chhotto TV-DVD unit, akta dark wood er centre table, akta chhotto 4-seater dining table, microwave, fridge. Ora bolchhilo fittings gulo besh lojjhode tobe shotyi kotha bolte dekhe bojha jai na. Amra kothai accommodation nebo, sheta niye besh chhap e achhi. Ora ei mash er sheshe Somerset e Somerset Mews bole akta apartment complex e shift kore jachhe, shekhane laundry ache,fitness centre ache akta, prochur Bengali families aar akdom raasta cross korei Patel Bazaar, jekkhane shomosto Indian necessities are easily available.Amrao okhane jete parle khushi hotam, kintu amader problem ta hochhe je unlike them, we don’t have a car, so Somerset would be too far for K to commute unless he can become part of a car pool with ppl from his office,who also share the same timings. Somerville area ta K er office er kaachhe,okhane prochur lokjon o ache K er office er, but okhane dokkan paat ektu kom aar Bengali families thakleo besh scattered bhabe ache. Moumita to ato frustrated chhilo kotha bolar lokjon na peye je amader peye hathe shorgo peyechhe mone hochhilo. Ora Somerville ei thaake, kintu laundry ta oder badi theke beriye besh khaanikta. Winter er kotha bhebei lokjon ekhane laundry r byapare ato concerned, karon it is supposed to be unbelievably cold during the winter months and therefore, venturing outside is a terror.
Kaal rate amader phirte 10.45 pm hoye gechhilo.K er friend, Sushmit had called thrice aar amader nap eye, akta voice message rekhe gechhilo je amar ato raateo room e nei dekhe or ektu chinta hochhe.Amra immediately call up kore oke reassure korlam je we are perfectly ok!!!

More details coming up soon. Here it’s 10 pm, Mon July 8th and my poor K is waiting for me to serve dinner. The menu tonight is rajma chawal and yogurt. Am off to serve dinner !!!